id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
