Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
