Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Randomize
