We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize