You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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