Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
