yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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