Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
