Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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