This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Randomize
