Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
