Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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