Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
