I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
