Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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