Porn is love you can see.
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
