Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
