how can u be prego again
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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