I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
