she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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