I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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