btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
