Ambien. No doubt about it.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize