I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
