sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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