How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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