As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
You're breaking my sexual little heart
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
