I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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