She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
