Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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