As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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