i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
