So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
