"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
