I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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