I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize