either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
