Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Randomize
