Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
she peed on how many people?
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Randomize
