please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
