so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize