so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
