i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Randomize
