He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
