I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
