i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
