Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
