If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize
