You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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