You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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