i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
